I hate me.

I hate anorexia. I hate that it is part of my everyday life. I hate that I was picked to become obsessed with my weight; with my body. I hate that everything I eat is a calculation; every plan I make centres around food. I hate that I have never stopped fighting and yet it […]

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…keep going…[or] the worst day of my life and the pain it left that has since got less painful

I can’t remember the conversation I had with the child. I can’t even remember whether the child was a boy or a girl. But I know the child’s mother came back from wherever she had been – probably the toilet – and called the child away. I was weird.  I had just thrown a whole […]

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The Art of Struggling

Yeah it’s Christmas and New Year again. Not going to lie, I don’t find it easy. That doesn’t mean that I’ve had a rubbish Christmas. I really haven’t. I love feeling like I’m a part of my family and visiting Chatsworth with Granny and going to see A Christmas Carol at the RSC. However, it’s […]

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Just Christmas

Christmas falls on a Tuesday this year. It’s very important to remember this fact. Christmas is one day of the year. It will be over as soon as it arrives and we’ll be into January before you know it. Christmas hasn’t always been a difficult time for me: I used to love, love, love it. […]

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Never Enough

I am travelling back from an RSC production of A Christmas Carol. It’s not late but it could be. I’m listening to my iPod. Loud. The Greatest Showman. Clichéd, yes. Do I care? Not really. You reach an age when impressing others with your music choices ceases to matter. I’ve not a lot to write […]

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