At the beginning of this year, I wrote a blog post about how I was going to do things differently in 2019. As I remember it, I was going to take up yoga and stop drinking. I had a vision of becoming a sort of self-possessed highly spiritual being. I forgot that I can’t carry […]Read More Small Changes
I’ve written about bullying before. I’ve spent thousands of hours thinking about bullying and, in particular, my experience with bullying. Last night, I watched Jesy Nelson’s documentary Odd One Out. I was struck by how profoundly emotional and moving it was; how many home truths it hits. Because it’s true: once someone has been bullied, […]Read More The Unforgivable Curse
Life changes every day. This is why I cannot and will not ever believe that suicide is the right answer. This is why you have to hold on tight. This is why you have to stay alive. I’m not going to lie: the past few weeks have been tough. A couple of weeks ago, I […]Read More Suicide and the importance of waiting
I walk down corridors at work with ‘resting anxiety face’ and my arms crossed across my chest in a sort of strange and protective manner. This is not because I think I’m about to be attacked, but because I am constantly frightened that I have upset everyone and that everyone is cross with me and […]Read More Are you cross with me?
Mental illness is exhausting – there’s no doubt about it. It’s like having a new puppy that demands constant attention and never grows up. Every time you think it’s settled for a while, it wakes up and cries, or demands to be fed, or wees on your new rug. It can be – and is […]Read More Life After
I’m going to be honest. I’m not in a good place at the moment. Physically, I know that I’m the furthest away from what I should be that I have been since I was discharged from hospital. Mentally, I’m never so sure, because I always feel that – when I get to the point that […]Read More The Rabbit Hole
Before I start, I want to say that – if you are living with PTSD – this is not about you. I think you’re brave and strong for coping with such a horrendous illness day in, day out and you deserve all the warnings you need to get through life. Trigger warnings, for the uninitiated, […]Read More Triggered